It’s okay to cry

Sometimes I just feel like crying. Initially I don’t really know why. But, as I have learned to allow myself to feel my feelings, I am also working on being introspective as I cry. I find that my tears come at the most unexpected times, and also at the most expected. I’m learning that my tears are for past hurts, physical pain, grieving what could have been, or even grieving what might be.

 As I embrace my tears and explore where they come from, I also have started to realize how often I struggle with seeing those I love cry. Whether their tears come because of something I have done, or they are experiencing physical pain, or they aren’t even sure where their tears come from, my initial reaction is to make it stop. As I dig deeper into this initial reaction, I am exploring that crying was not a welcome experience in my own childhood.

If I was taught that crying is a bother, or annoying, or too much, then I have to reteach myself that crying is okay. That it is a normal part of feeling our feelings or sadness, grief, loss, anger, and even joy! Reteaching myself through experience, introspection, and letting the tears flow. When I feel the hot tears welling up at the back of my eyes, I know that I need to let them escape instead of blinking them away.

 So I keep working on healing this part of me. I keep pushing through the desire to shut the tears down when they come. I work hard at just holding space for those I love to cry. I even have to repeat to myself often, “It’s okay to cry.” Because it is okay to cry. In fact, crying can help us move through the heaviness of big feelings and move towards a place of healing. Releasing those tears can also help release the pent-up big feelings we have held for weeks, months or even years. And I know that now.

 Sometimes I just need to cry.

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